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Top Three Mistakes I Made In My Marriage

There are several mistakes I see business women, especially alpha females, make in relationships. I know them well because I am guilty of them myself and have had to work through them in my soon to be 20 years of marriage.

Trying to make our husbands like us. Some Alpha Women tend to think that their husbands should be as busy as they are, as vocal as they are or as entrepreneurial as they are. We can sometimes make the mistake of thinking our spouses are not as successful as we are if they are not operating at the same “level” we see ourselves on. The truth is an Alpha Woman would bump heads and clash with an Alpha Male. Strong women in business need someone that is supportive, understanding and quite the opposite. I wouldn’t say polar opposite but someone that is confident in who they are, able to bring her balance, wisdom, all while still progressing in his professional and personal development. This is my definition of a power couple, what one lacks the other has in abundance!

Running their home life like their business life. As women in business we have to learn to take off the CEO hat and put on the WIFE hat. Regardless of our roles out of the home we must become a soft and safe place for our partners. One of my favorite scriptures says husbands are to love their wives but wives need to respect their husbands. I always grin when reading that, it is basically saying men say they want love but they really want respect. They want a wife that honors them, makes time for them, acknowledges even the little things they do. I wonder if God know that women are wired to naturally love what they can appreciate? I truly believe a mans ego is like glass, easy to break and hard to repair. In my 19+ years of marriage I had to learn how to speak life to my husband even when his ego was shattered. We can do that by cooking their favorite meals, giving them time to process, initiating sex (that’s major), and doing our best to pray with them and for them (privately).

Not making time to still date. As a business woman we can over work! We can fail to make time for our family and marriage. It is important to schedule dates and trips with our spouses. To continue to invest in the marriage like you did in the beginning. I will also say I do understand there are times opportunities will present itself and it looks as if we have to sacrifice our family to get it done, but let me present a new concept. Find a way to include the family in these moments, we must teach our children what it means to be an entrepreneur. We include our family in some of our business dealings so they can learn the skills that our school system may not teach them.

Lastly, I would like to add that all couples are paired uniquely and marriage counseling is a big part of what has helped my marriage. We must do whatever it takes to keep our marriages and families unified. Check out this video featuring our accountability couple.

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